Week 02


Noteworthy Happenings in Week 02

Texas, Oregon, West Virginia are all 3-0.

CSU is 0-3.

 

Notable Waiver Adds and Drops

None of note.

 

Message Boards

I AM NUMBER 1
by: Abe Harkleman (Henry's 9 babies)
Sep 11


#1 Can Catcher
#1 Budweiser Drinker


Duck Cougar, ante up Mountaineers.
by: Izzy Harkleman (1 (900) MIX-ALOT)
Sep 11

 

The best part is watching the Houston cheerleaders trying to decide if its a fake fight or not.

Thank god Oregon is kicking ass, Fantasy Football looks like its goin' be a looooong year.

country roads....
by: Ben Wiltonsburg (Constantently)
Sep 12


take me home.....3-0 after tomorrow night. If WVU is blowing away Maryland, you guys might get a glimpse of a little brilliance that goes by the name Noel Devine.

Fed (not that you are reading this since you are probably busy stocking toilet paper in all the outhouses at Zilker Park), I appreciate your shit talking about WVU's struggles with Marshall. May I ask who your college team is? Texas? Michigan? Harvard? Or are you strictly Bills? Incredible last second field goal by Elam, how did they get that FG unit on the field with 10 seconds left?

Park, Oregon's looking strong, just like last year's 4-0 team before.......well, you know. At least you have fantasy football....oooh, sorry.

Lombarchi, I hear Las Vegas has you as the odd's on favorite to have a fantasy team with the most name changes this year, with Jon coming in a close second. Should be a good battle.

Nick, you live in Houston?? That makes three texans in this league...three f**king Texans?? That's some farfurnuckle bulls**t!! If we get above 1/3 Texan membership, it'll be time for a new commish, y'all can count on that.

Fed (I'm not done with you), two QB injuries in week 1? I can't believe I didn't accept any of your Pennington trade offers. Too bad you traded those other QB's, you may need them soon.

Johnny, how's it going? It looks like we've got a little Texas-WVU battle brewing here. Looking forward to it. Without Walton and CSU bringing the heat on my Lobos, I need a new foe.

Abe, you're looking strong. Keep working that waiver board. You sure you don't want JaMarcus? poor guy was picked up and dropped in the same breath....give the guy a chance.

Naropa, still undefeated for those keeping score.

watch It's Always Sunny
by: Abe Harkleman (Henry's 9 babies)
Sep 13


Being #1 and all I command you all to slam a Budweiser and watch a show tonight on FX. It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia is funny, watch it.

Jon is next up on the AHark run to the FF championship.

sorry Abe...
by: Ben Wiltonsburg (Noel Devine)
Sep 14


I missed your show last night....I was too busy watching a certain somebody run for 136 yards on 5 carries. If it's any consolation, the guy has two children from two different women (in true Travis Henry-esque fashion), and he is only a freshman in college. I couldn't help it, I had to change my team name.

Johnny, WVU 3-0 after playing an ACC school on the road, on our way up the rankings once Nebraska beats USC. Good luck against mighty UCF.

Hey Fed, the southwest corner of Zilker needs 12 more outhouses, STAT!!!!

More Lanyards!! (inside joke for Lombarchi and Izzy....sorry)

News update, the only thing more annoying than CU Buffs fans is FSU Seminole fans.....not a good weekend to be in Boulder, I'm heading out of town.

Excerpt from "More Lanyards," Act IV, Scene III
by: Bart Lombarchi (The Hindenburg)
Sep 14

Five men stand in a circle, peering towards the ground. One has several hundred lanyards around his neck. He pauses, then reaches toward a lanyard on the ground.

Dude #2:

"Nope, not that one, man. That one appears to be lying in a pool of urine. Yep, we're going to leave that one there. C'mon, I think I see Mark over there hitting on the lead singer of the Go Team..."

Dude #3:

"I ain't saying she's a gold digger, but you don't see her...something...forgot the line...something...something...wait for it...I ain't saying she's a gold digger..."

Dude #4 to Dude #5:

"Ok, sure, whatever, dude. I dare you to climb the scaffolding. Now enough already, I'm tired of hearing about it."

Perry Farrell drives by in a golf cart while being berated by his wife.

The five exit, pursued by a bear.

I've got a fever...
by: Bart Lombarchi (The Hindenburg)
Sep 14


I am so high on the Duckies right now that I'm going to start Kellen Clemens this week against Baltimore.

Madness, you say? Maybe, but 60% of the time, Clemens wins every time.

ComegetsomeWalton.asyouwhere?

Money Update
by: Bart Lombarchi (The Hindenburg)
Sep 14


Okay, you can Paypal the $25 to:

<link redacted>

Get it done this weekend. Embezzle the money if you have to.

Re: Money Update
by: Abe Harkleman (Henry's 9 babies)
Sep 15 10:17am


I was kidding about paypal, way to go. What is the plan, winner take all? I like the idea of half the money goes to the regular season point leader, and the other half goes to the tournament winner. Just my take.

Fed, good job making sure Nick and Ryan got plenty of all they can drink booze this weekend. Its not like they both don't have serious drinking problems.

See the rest of you from the top of the leader board again after week 2.

zzzz is a genius
by: Abe Harkleman (Henry's 9 babies)
Sep 16


Sam is some sort of genius or a stupid moron that just totally lucked out. I picked Cin defense by the way... -4pts

grossman.....
by: Ben Wiltonsburg (Noel Devine)
Sep 16 5:39pm


can go suck Johnny's mom's penis.....what a piece of shit!!1

WVU, keeps winning and dropping in the rankings. No love for the hillbillies. Texas, way to pull off the tough victory against THE University of Central Florida. Longhorns keep rolling. Who do you have next? Rice? Good luck with that one.

Abe, hope you enjoyed your run at the top, short but sweet. Don't pull a Fed and stop posting once you start losing.

Walton, nice pickup on Anderson, don't expect those numbers again.....ever.

Miles, good fucking grief! At least bench Tomlinson and show some sportsmanship against your good friend.

Lobos over Wildcats on the road....that's as sweet as Chocolate Rain.

Minutia

1 To Grossman's mother, that expletive was, of course, directed towards Jamie's mother. Thought we should clear that up.

Week 02 Fantasy Football Scores

Teams:
Points:
   
I. Harkleman 133.76
Ryder 157.20
   
Lombarchi 127.46
Sammy 187.40
   
A. Harkleman 143.63
Garciaparra 204.10
   
Nick 113.53
Miles 218.50
   
Federov 182.96
Wiltonsburg 138.14

 

Standings After Week 02

Team Wins Losses
     
Mark Federov 2 0
Johnny Ryder 2 0
Miles Bowen 2 0
Abe Harkleman 1 1
Sammy Walton 1 1
Ben Wiltonsburg 1 1
Jon Garciaparra 1 1
Izzy Harkleman 0 2
Brad Lombarchi 0 2
Nick Wentworth 0 2


<--Week 01

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